Rotten Apple

Disclaimer: This is a rant, not my normal kinda blog. I will be using comparisons that will make sense to some and not to others. If you are not knowledgeable about the content, please do not leave a comment. All that will do is irritate me more. Thank you. On with the show!


I had a very interesting day yesterday. It was my first day on a temp job through a very well known agency. For this blog, I will refer to them as "Rotten Apple".

Rotten Apple placed me with an escrow company in the area. I did a little bit of research online and discovered that said escrow company specialized in Real Estate Foreclosures. I contacted R.A. and explained to my "agent" that I have Z E R O experience with Real Estate REO's. She said that the company actually wanted an Escrow Officer but were willing to settle with an assistant. That I would be making follow-up telephone calls etc. She stated that the escrow company had my resume and knew what to expect of me. Fine.

I showed up to escrow, completely under qualified and unprepared for what lay ahead of me...

First of all, it was a clusterf**k. I have never seen such disarray and chaos in what should be a very controlled environment, in my opinion. Files everywhere. Stacks of them on the floor, on desks, spilling out of filing cabinets, papers everywhere. A folder of "homeless" checks that no one was able to place with the correct escrow. Woah. At 8:15 in the freaking morning, the phone was ringing off the hook. There were 16 lines and at several points throughout the day each and every one of them were lit up. Imagine the stock exchange only on an 'escrow high'.

So I meet with the "head honcho". She explains to me that 'the girls' are going to be giving me work, namely escrow instructions and packaging docs. She asked me if I was familiar with "Streamline", their escrow software. I told her that I was not. She seemed a bit peeved and mumbled that she asked Rotten Apple to only place her with candidates who were. Lovely.

I am placed with two girls, both escrow assistants. They are handing me new escrows and asking me to type escrow instructions concurrently. My response was "If you have a few minutes to run through Streamline with me, I can take notes and start working on them for you." They look at each other then back at me. "You aren't familiar with Streamline...?" No, I said...

They then decide to teach me how to 'package docs' (escrow instructions). Mind you, I have Z E R O experience with real estate escrow instructions, have NO clue what needs to be attached, am confused by all the freaking hands in the pot: Selling Agent, Listing Agent, Buyer, Broker, Seller (being the bank that foreclosed on the property) and Lender. I was given a brief "staple this to this but not this and sometimes this" run thru. Once the docs were stapled, I took them to my desk and took notes - what goes to who etc. Which ones to email, which ones to fax, who doesn't get copies of zone disclosures etc. At this point, my head is spinning and it's only 9:30 am.

I am then handed 11 new escrows to open. Awesome, this I can do!! I grab take sheets, some more coffee, white out and a rubber finger tip. Time to get to work... I'm digging through a fistfull of loose papers trying to make sense of it all, filling in the take sheets the best I can and asking questions as I go along. Finally, one of the girls whose brain I was picking decided to ask me what everyone else was wondering..

Her: Aren't you an escrow officer? *narrowing eyes*

Me: No, I'm not. I worked as an escrow assistant for 4 years though. This is my first experience with Real Estate, I did Personal Property Escrows. I'm a fast learner though. :D

Her: It's pretty much the same, isn't it?

Me: Actually.... no. *blink blink* Not at all. I worked with manufactured homes. (I think all she heard was 'trailers'.)

Her:Well...What CAN you do? I don't have time to train you on our software.

Me: I will do all of your filing, escrow openings and will try to filter your phone calls the best I can.

Her: Okay, call the listing agents and find out when we will get the deposits on these files. *hands me an armful of files* And ask about the vesting so you can type the escrow instructions. (Wha...?) Oh, and make sure to get ahold of title to get new prelims. (WHAT in the HELL is a PRELIM!?!) Also, make sure to record the Order #, the Escrow # and the REO # on the jacket of the file.

I nodded and took the files back to my desk.

Another girl said that she overheard the conversation and that she too thought 'escrow was escrow'.

Me: Not at all. You can escrow things besides stick built homes. I did Mfd. Home Dealer escrows, where the Dealer is the seller in the escrow... the 'seller' aka registered owner is more of a lien holder.

Her #2: They do escrows for that??

Me: *blink blink* Yes... They do escrows for those, for private party sells, even for cattle at some places. Escrow isn't just for stick built homes.

Her #2: *frown* Humph. ::turns around and continues to work::

*SIGH*

Lunch time, thank goodness.

I run to 7-11, grab two rubbery taquitos and a Diet Coke. (O_o) Yum.

I had thoughts of just spending the rest of my day in the parking lot, sitting in my hot car doing a crossword puzzle...

When I returned to my desk I had messages waiting for me from agents I had called. They were asking me questions regarding their escrows that I was completely unable to answer and had to ask if I could call them back. (Note: Agents are not nice.)

Time for me to pester the 'smart girls' in the office again.

Me: The listing agent wants to know what the difference in the fees will be if her client decides to do a 10-31 exchange.

Her: Give her the fees off the list. *buries her head back in the 6 inch thick file*

Me: Okay.

I sit at the desk. I look to my left and there is chaos. In front of me, chaos. Behind me there's a meek little thing being trained by a foul-mouthed, hot-tempered woman.

At this point in the day, I am feeling completely helpless. I am watching these girls hustle about the office, practically shoving each other out of the way at the copier (Yes, 30 girls. One copier.) and there isn't a damn thing I can do to help relieve their stress! *whimper* No one had the time to even give me the password to get INTO Streamline where I could have tinkered around, looked through the escrow documents to familiarize myself with the verbage, etc.

I spent the rest of the afternoon working on take sheets.

When I ran to my car at 5:02 pm I was fuming. Rotten Apple was fully aware of the fact that I was not familiar with Real Estate Escrows. They sent me in there blind as a bat just to have a warm body sitting in the chair. I felt like a dumbass.


First I talked to Cousin J and girly friend J.G. to get their opinions... Do I call R.A. and tell them that I am not going back to the escrow company? That I was of little use to the girls there, no one had time to train me etc? Yes, they both tell me: Call Rotten Apple.

*R I N G R I N G*

"Rotten Apple, blah blah blah. How can I help you?"

Me: I just finished the first day of my assignment and I need to talk to my agent.

RA: Okay, let me get her for you.

..insert very long wait here..

Agent: Hey, Sheri. What's up...

Me: We need to talk about my day. I left frustrated and very angry with R.A. for sending me in blind as a bat.

Agent: That's a pretty negative attitude, Sheri.

Me: Yea, I know. You were fully aware that I had zero R.E. Escrow experience, yet you told them that you were sending them an escrow officer. Number one, I was an escrow assistant, not an escrow officer. Big difference.

Agent rudely interrupts here: They had your resume, they knew what they were getting.

Me: You don't understand. Just because I worked in escrow does not mean that I am familiar with REO's - it's totally different!!

Agent: You have a bad attitude. I haven't heard back from them, I called to find out how your first day went.

Me: You haven't heard back from them because they didn't even realize I was there today! It was so busy and I felt helpless, I had no clue what was going on! Those girls are buried over there, you need to find them someone who is familiar with REO's - they don't have the time to train me.

Agent: You said you had escrow experience.

Me: *yanking hair out by the roots* I DO!! There are so many different kinds of escrows, not just real estate!!

Agent: Call me at 8:45 tomorrow morning and I will let you know if they want you to come back.

Me: mmm hmm.

::click::

Note To Those Who Know No Better: ESCROW DOES NOT EQUAL ESCROW JUST AS A PASTRY CHEF DOES NOT EQUAL A SUSHI CHEF. GET IT?